Forgiving an affair - not really, right?!

Admittedly, the thought is not exactly pleasant. Forgiving cheating also brings unforeseen consequences with it. Such as unwanted images in your head: my boyfriend/girlfriend may even have spent a nice time with a friend, perhaps even my best friend. Picturing how your partner reached climax, had an orgasm or, for all the men reading, joyfully spilled his ejaculate while he was inside her. There are nicer things, dear readers, no question. But don't give up. It's worth noting how you found out about it. Did your partner tell you on their own, did you have to push, or did you even find out the classic way, like in a Hollywood movie? Catching your partner in the act and then forgiving the affair? Not an easy task.

Put positively, an affair is a sexual absence of your partner that you didn't plan for. If it bothers you that he had sex with someone, well, he may have done that before your time as well. Not much of a difference, then, right? Forgiving an affair starts with forgiving yourself, too.

[caption id="attachment_349" align="alignright" width="337"]Being faithful Forgiving an affair[/caption]

Forgiving an affair - what speaks in favor?

When you talk to your partner about it, don't immediately start yelling at them. Scolding is allowed, of course, but remember that their poor nerves may already be frayed as it is. Clarify whether the affair was a one-time thing. How did it come about? Did someone simply want to have some fun, were they perhaps drunk at the start of the affair? Everybody slips up now and then. If your partner also asks for your forgiveness in a sincere, faithful and authentic way, you should consider that they may mean it. In any case, all the facts must be put on the table. Some people cheat for fun, others have a serious background. Maybe your partner was missing something, something they rightfully would like to have. And last but not least: forgiving the affair doesn't mean picking the relationship straight back up. Take your time with it if needed. Your partner should understand.

Forgiving an affair - no!

- Your partner isn't doing it for the first time? At some point it's over. - He doesn't come clean with the whole truth or sees no fault in himself. - The affair lasted a very long time and carries high emotional significance for your partner. - You can't forgive him and want to be on your own. Completely legitimate.

Forgiving an affair may not be easy, but it can mean emotional relief and a fresh start for you.